Acts 20:24
²⁴However, I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me—the task of testifying to the gospel of God's grace.

In the book of Acts Paul endures many afflictions and hardships. The Bible indicates many are the afflictions are the righteous. Psalm 34:19. So, for the sake of our lord and savior Jesus Christ we too will suffer many things for his name sake. In turn we will seek the lord because of ourselves, we can do nothing. The heights and depths to which God will take us, removes us from this worldly angle of things. There is no physical explanation that can comfort us. We face these trials not in our own defense but in the defense of a kingdom in which we will suffer many things. And yet we our selves are defenseless. We continue to place our faith and trust in a savior who is the first to be raised from the dead. The first to rise and claim victory from the grips of death. The first to take back what the enemy stole from Gods People. Matthew 16:18-19. However, even the enemy cannot take what God has not given him permission to take.

I find myself living and walking in the Grace that God has given to me freely by the blood that was shed for my sins. At this moment I am going through a stronghold. A stronghold that surpasses what I have been taught. In essence, it contradicts the teaching of my youth. I recognize the charge that has been placed on my life from the womb. To preach the Gospel to all nations even unto the four corners of the earth. Yet, there is weaknesses in my life that only God can help strengthen me. I have tried to fight it on my own and lost emotionally. I recognize the mess that I have made. The door that I have opened and now I am praying for strength to walk through this door. More so than facing what is on the other side of the door, is the mirror that reflects who and what I am. In this walk I have learned not to judge others. The very day that you judge you will be judged. How can God be a deliverer if you have never been delivered from anything?

Emotionally I am guilty of love. And because of love, I would rather a soul be saved than to live in hell for an eternity. I pray the love of God will help me dismiss this affection and to press forward into the high calling that God has called me to do. Although the flesh will decease the work must continue. This is my desire that God’s will be accomplished until the day of his (Jesus) return.

Eleanor