I sometimes question why I have always had a job where people where always in need . My present job is HIV case management. When a person is diagnosed with HIV or Aids they can choose to have case management services in which a team will assist the client in obtaining services according to their needs. I wondered to myself why I was drawn to such a field. I mean some of these people are dying why would someone want to be in a field where if you don't take care of you health you will die, no if, ands or but's about it. I am drawn to the scriptures in John 6: 48 I am the bread of life, 50 I am the living bread which came down from heaven: if any man eat of this bread, he shall live for ever: and the bread that I will give is my flesh, which I will give for the life of the world. We are all dyeing everyday and when your time is up and God calls your number that's it. I believe that the enemy's purpose is to conquer and destroy in anyway possible. I was put in this field for a purpose, to do my fathers will. To give hope to the hopeless. It is true we will not be here always but with Jesus we can have everlasting life. God is a spirit and they that worship him must worship in spirit and truth. John 4:24 I think of all the stupid things I did as a teenager to put my life at risk all it takes is one time. If you ever had unprotected sex you can easily have been a victim of this virus it as simple as that. I count my self as being God blessed and you should too. Esther

I was thinking about how some of us look at others and decide that some do not deserve God's Mercy and grace I am guilty of this myself. I notice that at times I cant help it, especially my sisters and brothers in Christ. God is still not finished with me yet and I have the faith to know that I am a work in progress all of us are. We are never to old to learn something new. Before I came to Christ I used to love to talk about those "church folk" and if you were a phony, watch out. If you came bearing a cross I came to read you your last rights. Now that I have found my true love which is Jesus Christ I can say that it was the way some people represent God. My way of living Gods word is to show my weakness. I am made strong because God builds me up in my weakness. I am not shy to tell folks I messed up today but I keep pressing on my father is not done with me yet. I still dont understand the"holier than thou attitude" We can bring sinners that are in the dark to Christ, as well as sinners that are pretending to be in the light to Christ by showing our faults. If we were all perfect we would not need Jesus. I am so glad we have Jesus. ACTS 15:7 And when there had been much disputing, Peter rose up, and said unto them , men and brethren, ye know how that a good while ago God made choice among us, that the gentiles by my mouth should hear the word of the gospel, and believe. 8 And God which knoweth the hearts, bare them witness, giving then the holy ghost, even as he did unto us; Just because we may think that some people don't deserve gods love doesn't give us the right to kill their spirit. We too walked in the darkness and what a revelation it was when Jesus saved our souls. Love is the answer. Love those even when you don't see with the natural eye anything worth loving. We walk not by sight but by faith. God does not make mistakes. Love and keep loving. It is not our job to judge. Some of us judge and forget to look at our own faults. Pray that God will keep you with his unconditional love.
E.E.

The other day I was watching a soap opera and in the soap opera a character had a split personality. Meaning it was the same person but this person had different personalities. One of the personalities was the good girl and the other was the bad girl. When ever stress or difficult situations would arise the bad girl would come out and handle the stress she is the keeper, the bold one, the strong one, the one that takes all the garbage people dish out with a frown and dishes it right back. While the good girl is this angel like nice girl who would rather die than hurt anyone's feelings. I feel it is important to write about this topic because in my walk with God I find myself making mistakes everyday. I wonder when will I be this perfect Christian passing out bible tracks with out a worry in the world. I have gone through so many trials and tribulations that I felt, now I can take my rest. Not only did I take up a fight but persecution along with it. Trial, error and a list of other things. The battle went from the physical to the mental the mind is a tricky thing which needs no help driving its self crazy. Sometimes we as humans can create things on our own just with or minds. "It is a battle field of the mind" but I am so glad that I have Jesus to cast all my cares upon. In the splitting of a personality I don't really think it is split at all I think that the two make up one. One just picks up what the other cant handle. I n this walk with Christ it wont be easy we don't need to play tuff this world will surely rip us apart. Thessalonians 3:3 "but the lord is faithful, who shall stablish you and keep you from evil. In the world hurt breeds hurt and this leads to sin and death and a everlasting vicious cycle of hate but through Christ there is love to look past faults and give your enemy to god vengeance is the lords. I recognize that I am not perfect I have to guard my mouth everyday from dishing out those fleshy feel good words. I thank God that the difference is now I know a difference before I did not care. Good fruit brings forth good fruit I pray that someone may receive a blessing from Gods word.

Deaconess E

I n Samuel 1:7 "but the lord said to Samuel, Look not on his countenance, or on the height of his stature; because I have refused him: for the lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looked on the outward appearance, but the lord looked on the heart. I am so glad that God looks at the heart and not at the foolish intentions of our actions. I have found out that as sure a s we are human we will fail. It is inevitable as surely as we are born we will surely die I believe that it is our choice to be born again. God will knock but he will not force us to do his will. Society has made us feel as if there are no consequences to our actions as long as it is ok with society's norms it is ok with us. The lord seeks a disciplined people who are not afraid to go against the grain in his name. In Jesus name I pray that God's people may go against the grain and continue to receive favor with the lord.
Esther Evans